Real ones use bidet or a watering can first then wipe to simply dry. Much cleaner.
Obligatory bidet comment. You don’t have to wipe like you’re trying to get peanut butter out of carpet. All shits become the same with a bidet, whether a short sticky stoagie or a hot wet mess of diarrhea. Imagine trying to clean a mud snowman off your driveway with a pressure washer. It can do anything.
I’m not gonna pressure wash my tush, that’s a terrible metaphor! Too much power!
So until they read about it on the internet they were leaving their butthole covered with shit all day?
Bro, wash your ass. You don’t even need to get that fucking deep, just buy a shower scrubber.
Please don’t use a scrubber against your asshole. A washcloth you throw in the laundry after, or just your hands with lots of soap before and after is fine. You’re not going to awake any forbidden desires, you’re just making sure your body is clean.
Since nobody else has talked about it, blood in stool is most commonly caused by hemorrhoids which can be caused by wiping too hard but much more likey it’s due to spending too many hours sitting on hard or rough surfaces each day, and you could even have a natural disposition for hemorrhoids caused by enlarged veins and the way blood circulates throughout your legs. It can also be contributed to by leakage from irritated bowels, as well as in people who eat large meals just before sleeping.
Generally professional care isn’t required to resolve the issue, instead you can try spending less time sitting down, avoid bloodthinners, wash the area occasionally with cool or cold water, or sitting on an ice pack and rotating out with a hot pack. Many people have suggested dietary changes, such as eat a fucking salad for once in your life.
If it persists for longer than two or three weeks, seek professional care as it could require light surgery.
anon means that he wiped so frequently that the skin of his butthole wore away (and the paper still came back shitty)
Just shit in the shower and waffle stomp!
Waffle stomp of power!!
Bidets… You don’t have bidets?
Nah he didn’t even run for reelection
Wet the paper using the sink
Spit on that thang.
Hawk tua
Why? The toilet is literally right there.
The bowl water warms up as you use it. Warm.
Eat more fiber.
You need to shit some more. There is still ink in the pen.
Use a bidet, I find whenever I have a burning, the bidet does it.
The blood is likely from a popped hemroid
Moving to Finland was the best thing for my my butt. So clean.
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Obviously, a bidet is the best way to have a clean butt, but baby wipes are a good compromise when in public bathrooms, they clean much better than dry toilet paper. Or wash on the side of the bathtub.
Don’t flush them no matter what the packaging says, though.
How fucking strong is your toilet that you could flush an entire bidet down it?
They aren’t. That’s why you shouldn’t flush one!
Americans don’t get much fiber so the toilets have to be severely overbuilt.
This is true, my American uncle once flushed an F150 to save on towing costs after one of the con rods made a window in the block
I am adding “made a window in the block” to my lexicon. Thank you.
I wipe homeopathically.
0.5 mm² gently applied at the top of my crack for a nice even dispersal.
0.5 mm²of what? 0.5 MM² OF WHAT??
Well, in homeopathy, like cures like, so probably more shit.
Hot sauce?
I wipe homo pathetically, I’ll leave the details to your imagination.
You wipe up to the fourth knuckle?
Why would I stop wiping? There’s still blood back there!
Why use toilet paper when bidet shower exists?
Yes. You just use this to blast water into your colon until it’s sparkling clean inside. I love it.
