• dreadbeef@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 day ago

          and casual interest is definitely okay with me, therefore gimme a ‘yes’ to astrology. I have a serious interest in metaphysics so if someone can match me on my journey through quantum consciousness and they have a ton to say from an astrology perspective, I’m all ears. Anyone who is that interested in how the mind works is probably interesting person, imo, and worth having at least as a friend even if they think the hour I’m born determines who my woman is lol

            • dreadbeef@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              24 hours ago

              ?? what are you on about brother? I enjoy the company of women who are into astrology. Theyre fun. They enjoy me talking about orch or. They think im fun. its mutual human fun.

              • Nalivai@lemmy.world
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                22 hours ago

                If only it was the actual point in your original comment, that would be one thing. I was referring to all the other… stuff.

                • dreadbeef@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                  22 hours ago

                  and casual interest is definitely okay with me, therefore gimme a ‘yes’ to astrology.

                  I hope you have nothing against this statement.

                  I have a serious interest in metaphysics so if someone can match me on my journey through quantum consciousness and they have a ton to say from an astrology perspective, I’m all ears.

                  That sentence is me talking about orch or (quantum consciousness), and if a woman can match my knowledge on that subject (quantum consciousness) with their knowledge of astrology, then I am all ears.

                  Anyone who is that interested in how the mind works is probably interesting person, imo, and worth having at least as a friend even if they think the hour I’m born determines who my woman is lol

                  See my line of thinking? Any person (I keep saying woman here but whatever, you know what I mean) who has that much interest in the human mind is absolutely someone who is interesting to me. You know how few people actually give a fucking shit about how the mind works? If any person can match my interest in consciousness with their theories of astrology, no matter how wacky from a scientific pov, I am interested in them as a human being. They are cool people who I like to be around, and I have found it’s mutual.

                  What other stuff in my original comment is there? Can you quote me directly please and address the exact words I used? I have my entire original post here for you to dismantle. I’m a software engineer, it’s not like I have a doctorate in quantum mechanics, but I’m interested in it. Allow me to have my nerdy interests please, they literally don’t offend anyone but you apparently. And jesus learn to get along with human beings, people out there read about astronomy, whether you like it or not, and they’re perfectly normal human beings—more normal than you are.

  • xkbx@startrek.website
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    2 days ago

    “Yes, I work in… Finance something. How much do I make? I don’t even know if you’re good or bad yet.”

  • vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works
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    2 days ago

    Why history? If a woman came up toe and started talking about bronze age trade routes and the contributing factors for the fall of the Indus valley civilization I’d be more than happy. Wait the guy who made this is a gormless pissant, astrology is a red flag.

  • chocrates@piefed.world
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    2 days ago

    Wait I’m not supposed to trauma dump about my mental illnesses? I’ve been doing it fucking wrong

    • HowAbt2day@futurology.today
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      2 days ago

      Switching back to Colleen Hoover can correct that course but not after 33 minutes into bipolar disorder or 18 minutes into manic depression.

    • Broadfern@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      That’s how I made about half of my friends, probably wait for a dating scenario though.

      Probably start with taking turns infodumping about your favorite topics if you’re on a date with someone similar.

      • chocrates@piefed.world
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        1 day ago

        As I get older (late 30s) it seems to be working. Talking about going to therapy seems to at least not be a detriment.

  • balderdash@lemmy.zip
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    2 days ago

    It’s surprising more men don’t wear heels when dating. Women have all sorts enhancements, it’s only fair we do the same.

    • blarghly@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Actual heels would be feminine. The concept of high heels is feminine coded. The strut you do when wearing heels is feminine coded.

      I once bought a pair of steel toe redwing logging boots for a job I had. They had stupid high heels - like, I must have got a 4" boost. Which I found really annoying, since Im already 6’4". But I can almost guarentee the guy who sold them to me bought them just for that feature, as he was probably a 5’4" blue collar dude with a big truck.

      Guys have no real qualms about using fashion to make themselves taller. Heel lifts are a thing. You can probably add 3" to your height without anyone noticing with a 1" platform and a 2" lift or whatever.

      What they have a problem with is doing things that are feminine. Which - and it is weird I have to point this out - makes sense because they do not identify as feminine. Every time this topic comes up in left/liberal space, there’s a barrage of comments about how “men are dumb and insecure, why dont they just dress up like pretty girls - wouldn’t that be fun?” Which is so weird coming from a place that constantly talks about affirming peoples’ genders.

      Like, imagine you are talking to your friend who is a trans woman. Would you tell them “ugh, but you’d look so handsome in a suit with a short haircut. You have such a nice jawline - you should highlight it by growing out a beard!” Wouldnt that be really fucking weird? Wouldnt it make literally no sense at all, given this individual’s chosen gender identity? Wouldn’t it be considered quite rude and offensive to try to pressure someone into fitting your preference for their gender expression, rather than their own?

      Anyway, off topic. The point is, men have all sorts of options at their disposal, but most of these things are designed not to be noticed. The masculine role is to look good, but not flashy. To be put together, but not look like you tried to hard or care too much about your appearance. This is because what men are supposed to bring to the table are skills, resources, and personality. An overemphasis on appearance on the part of a man is seen as trying to get ahead or gain status through superfluous means - advancing without contributing to the group or gaining the friendship and approval of those around them. And this is seen as in poor taste, and is frowned upon. So as a man, if you want to enhance your appearance, you should only do it just enough that it can’t be noticed - or just enough that you look a bit more stylish or put together than the other men around you.

    • AlligatorBlizzard@sh.itjust.works
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      2 days ago

      I think shoe lifts are more common than you’d think, we’ve had a couple of major politicians accused of wearing them, but it’s kinda like hair implants, you’ve gotta be pretty insecure to get them in the first place (I’ve tried shoe lifts, they’re awful over maybe an inch), so they’re too insecure to talk about it either.

      • Signtist@bookwyr.me
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        2 days ago

        I used to have a 1.5" leg length difference, so I had to wear a big lift in one of my shoes throughout middle and part of high school as I had a few surgeries to slowly fix the difference. It was a major pain, and I often rolled my ankle in gym class and sports.

      • blarghly@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Women in heels, wearing makeup, having a skincare routine, picking clothes that flatter their figure, getting their hair done: they’re having fun and expressing themselves!

        Men wearing shoe lifts, getting hair plugs: what insecure losers.

        • AlligatorBlizzard@sh.itjust.works
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          2 days ago

          I definitely phrased that poorly. Getting hair plugs isn’t insecure, but often it’s insecurity that drives men to get it and definitely causes them to not talk about it afterwards.

    • BigDiction@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Ha I think there’s a long list of enhancements that many women do that more men should do. Put effort into your outfit, smell decent, drink a little less than normal when on a date.

  • WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
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    2 days ago

    When one woman tried to contact me from what my man brain thinks could be some sort of attempt at a date, she listed out going to the gym, music, cooking, and my eyes almost wanted to roll into my skull.

    I went for it anyway, didn’t really date, just investigated the person and talked normally.

    She raised too many red flags and my reaction was fuck no!

    • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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      1 day ago

      Care to share more details? Gym, cooking and music just sound super generic, but maybe I’m already too old to get some cues

      • WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
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        1 day ago

        Super generic. I’m apprehensive and avoid jumping into a date. She acts pretty interested, but at one point asks for a gift card. I’m already ambivalent, and this is a red flag.

        So I go for it anyway (already seeing her in the friendzone, and consider the money acceptable to waste), find out she does not have any way to recieve it and it would costs extra. I think screw this, not worth it. She says she won’t force me to if I don’t want to.

        Then goes 160° and says “why are you being so stingy”, “I asked you because I consider you a good friend” (we barely meet), and “just buy the giftcard”. I was basically only keeping the dating option open on principle that I should give everyone a chance, and was fine with friendship.

        But that was one hell of a red flag, and when I lost contact for other reasons, I just didn’t want to contact her for some more potential manipulation.