“Yes, I work in… Finance something. How much do I make? I don’t even know if you’re good or bad yet.”

Finally, the freedom to have sick plane crashes thanks to deregulation 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🦅🦅🦅💥💥💥

wait I actually get that

Ha, I can read 50% of this meme

I believe I am more confused than if I could read none

I was gonna go for Dolphewer (dolphin + fewer as fewer sounds like Führer)

They make the Transforming noise ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

when yo girl asks u to fart in her face 😎

Oh no, this is just an edit, it’s not real.

Source: I made it up

Assy McGee

Man I can’t keep up with all the new music stars’ names

Fun fact, if you copy something a person does, you’re mocking them. But if you reword what they’re saying and throw it back to them, you’re intellectually deepening the conversation 🧠🧠🧠

real and wholesome :’)

I just rub her left labia for two minutes then ask her if she came

༼ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ༽ ⌐■-■ Mission accomplished ᕕ༼⌐■-■༽ᕗ

Fake: I didn’t vote in this pole

Gay: I didn’t “vote” on this pole ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

“But I’m just an actor!”

“Can you play dead?”

bang

Fuck I miss that show

Right? Like just sit in my lap and pee a little like a normal person

(っ◔◡◔)っ

The original but ultimately rejected title from Beastie Boys’ smash hit

(. )( .)

Personally, I enjoy F5 myself. I find it more refreshing