I accidentally ended up with a very young lady. I know how this will sound, and all I can do is assure everyone that, at least for my part, everything I say is the absolute truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
I went to college late, I was 23 by the time I applied to college, and turned 24 shortly after starting classes. My birthday is in the first quarter, or so, of the year.
Anyways. I think I was in my second year of college when I met this girl, I don’t even remember how I met her honestly; it wasn’t a dating app, those things barely existed at the time and I haven’t ever used one; I just haven’t seen the need… Anyways, everything seems cool, she’s telling me she’s 17 and has a bday coming up. At this point I’m 24/25, and I’m thinking that’s a bit young, but since she’s basically 18 at this point, I don’t really see a problem with it… Anyways, birthday happens, Yay, and life goes on. After a few months as things get more and more complicated, as happens in most relationships, I come to find out that her birthday, was her 17th birthday, she was 16 when we met. I’m suddenly very not ok with everything.
It didn’t last super long after that. She was also preggo with her exes kid and never told me. The relationship was only like 5-6 months long.
She lost the kid, I believe it was a miscarriage, and I’m sad for her that happened, but too much weird bullshit and deception was happening so I called it off.
She wasn’t a good person. She’s on a short list of exes I don’t talk to anymore. Most of my exes I still consider good friends, even if I haven’t seen them in a long time.
I’m in a stable, long term relationship with a more age appropriate partner, for… Gosh, it has to be 10 years now? Time flies. There’s… 6? ish years between our ages, and we met when I was 30-something… I’m much happier now. Heh.
This just sounds like you were misled and it was awkward. I don’t think you intended to chase young women.
When I was in high school in the 80s it was not uncommon for high school girls in higher grades to have adult men as boyfriends. One of my teachers in fact did it, and got put on leave for a while LOL.
I was hoping that’s how it came across, since that’s what happened. So thank you for the confirmation.
I’ve never been much for dating significantly younger women, since they’re usually a bit unpredictable. By the time my SO and I got together, we were established in our careers and just looking for someone that wouldn’t constantly stir up drama. Our relationship has thankfully been extremely drama free. If there’s a problem we talk about it like the adults we are.
I honestly question what one does when you are dating someone when you are 15 and 17 respectively, which is no big deal, but then it becomes 17 and 19? Like you aren’t really doing anything wrong, you’ve just had a relationship. But what’s the legal take on that?
I know someone and this happened to her son, and he ended up on a sex offender database because he was 18, she was 17, and she sent him a nude or something and then cried foul to her parents. I just wonder about these grey areas. Believe it or not there is a subreddit for registered sex offenders so they can try and figure out how to navigate the details of life, and clearly some of their crimes are more along those lines than preying upon an actual child. I don’t think you did anything wrong, I think you just got misled.
In the instance you specifically cite, depending on the laws in their specific jurisdiction, that can certainly happen. I’m aware that there are laws in some/many areas (honestly not sure how common it is), that I’ve heard referred to as “Romeo and Juliet” laws. They specifically exempt people from such charges if their ages are too similar.
Of course the specifics are going to depend on the laws in the specific jurisdiction where it happened, when it happened… But I’m aware such laws exist.
I accidentally ended up with a very young lady. I know how this will sound, and all I can do is assure everyone that, at least for my part, everything I say is the absolute truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.
I went to college late, I was 23 by the time I applied to college, and turned 24 shortly after starting classes. My birthday is in the first quarter, or so, of the year.
Anyways. I think I was in my second year of college when I met this girl, I don’t even remember how I met her honestly; it wasn’t a dating app, those things barely existed at the time and I haven’t ever used one; I just haven’t seen the need… Anyways, everything seems cool, she’s telling me she’s 17 and has a bday coming up. At this point I’m 24/25, and I’m thinking that’s a bit young, but since she’s basically 18 at this point, I don’t really see a problem with it… Anyways, birthday happens, Yay, and life goes on. After a few months as things get more and more complicated, as happens in most relationships, I come to find out that her birthday, was her 17th birthday, she was 16 when we met. I’m suddenly very not ok with everything.
It didn’t last super long after that. She was also preggo with her exes kid and never told me. The relationship was only like 5-6 months long. She lost the kid, I believe it was a miscarriage, and I’m sad for her that happened, but too much weird bullshit and deception was happening so I called it off.
She wasn’t a good person. She’s on a short list of exes I don’t talk to anymore. Most of my exes I still consider good friends, even if I haven’t seen them in a long time. I’m in a stable, long term relationship with a more age appropriate partner, for… Gosh, it has to be 10 years now? Time flies. There’s… 6? ish years between our ages, and we met when I was 30-something… I’m much happier now. Heh.
This just sounds like you were misled and it was awkward. I don’t think you intended to chase young women.
When I was in high school in the 80s it was not uncommon for high school girls in higher grades to have adult men as boyfriends. One of my teachers in fact did it, and got put on leave for a while LOL.
I was hoping that’s how it came across, since that’s what happened. So thank you for the confirmation.
I’ve never been much for dating significantly younger women, since they’re usually a bit unpredictable. By the time my SO and I got together, we were established in our careers and just looking for someone that wouldn’t constantly stir up drama. Our relationship has thankfully been extremely drama free. If there’s a problem we talk about it like the adults we are.
I honestly question what one does when you are dating someone when you are 15 and 17 respectively, which is no big deal, but then it becomes 17 and 19? Like you aren’t really doing anything wrong, you’ve just had a relationship. But what’s the legal take on that?
I know someone and this happened to her son, and he ended up on a sex offender database because he was 18, she was 17, and she sent him a nude or something and then cried foul to her parents. I just wonder about these grey areas. Believe it or not there is a subreddit for registered sex offenders so they can try and figure out how to navigate the details of life, and clearly some of their crimes are more along those lines than preying upon an actual child. I don’t think you did anything wrong, I think you just got misled.
In the instance you specifically cite, depending on the laws in their specific jurisdiction, that can certainly happen. I’m aware that there are laws in some/many areas (honestly not sure how common it is), that I’ve heard referred to as “Romeo and Juliet” laws. They specifically exempt people from such charges if their ages are too similar.
Of course the specifics are going to depend on the laws in the specific jurisdiction where it happened, when it happened… But I’m aware such laws exist.