• rem26_art@fedia.io
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        4 days ago

        DRM Ribs. The Salmonella will not die until you pay for Traeger’s $19 a month subscription

        • xavier666@lemmy.umucat.day
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          2 days ago

          The Salmonella will not die until

          Oops, RnD team accidentally created indestructible Salmonella bacteria which consumes flesh. Management was pushing RnD to create a better bacteria because hobbyist grill people were killing the bacteria and bypassing the DRM on the grill, but it escaped the lab. It has infected nearly all animals other than sea fish because of proximity. Survivors build floating cities on the sea and thus we have Waterworld!

          • grue@lemmy.world
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            3 days ago

            Wow, that’s super-topical in more ways than I had expected. The more I read, the more scarily insightful it gets.

            spoiler
            • The main character being a refugee, with almost all that entails (can’t blame Doctorow for not anticipating it getting this bad)
            • The dystopian collusion between the appliance-rentiers and the landlord, as well as the climax hinging on lack of tenant protections
            • The way capitalism attempts to subsume all critique.

            This is a story that’s important, that everybody needs to read.

          • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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            3 days ago

            I’m an immigrant (not a refugee to be clear) and this excerpt absolutely nails the camaraderie aspect of it and the way that living in immigrant neighborhoods/buildings feels. Turns out, Doctorow’s father was born in a refugee camp.

        • Midnight Wolf@lemmy.world
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          3 days ago

          Skill issue. I eat my food raw. The explosive shits are just me speedrunning my bathroom breaks. Efficiency baby!

        • ssɐqɯnᗡ@quokk.au
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          3 days ago

          Someone’s gonna crack that shit and release it as a spice and when you open it a cool as fuck midi techno track plays while you crack your ribs.

      • Match!!@pawb.social
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        4 days ago

        raw shrimp on a grill staying completely uncooked next to grilled chicken and steak because you don’t have the DRM for SeaPak©️ shrimp (photorealistic, art station, comedy, vivid)