For me all it took was succeeding at life. After 45 longs years. Then my depression virtually disappeared.
Being approved by the FDA is a really low bar at this point
Is it? Does the FDA even have anyone left who could approve anything?
it’s just a drinking bird toy that presses enter to accept any applications
I mean, if it looks stupid, but it works, then it’s not stupid.
But at the same time, what the fuck is going on in Arizona that their brains can be fixed with a toaster?
Deep transcranial magnetic stimulation, known as TMS.
https://www.goodrx.com/conditions/depression/fda-approves-brainsway-deep-tms-device
Ah, this is the treatment that works for like half of all the patients they try it on, nobody is quite sure why it works, and insurance refuses to pay for it until you’ve spent months (if not years) cycling through the list of usual meds that get prescribed.
“works on half the patients” is a pretty decent rate for a depression therapy. Traditional meds don’t do better AFAIK, which is why “try a bunch of different meds until you find one that works” is such frequent advice.
Yeah, in a healthcare system that actually prioritized patient health, this would be the first thing prescribed, rather than the last. As far as I’m aware, there’s no negative side effects… or any side effects, really. It’s just magnetic fields. It either works or it doesn’t.
Meanwhile the meds take weeks to build up in your system before you know if you’re getting the desired effect and come with all sorts of side effects.
Where can I get the one that lets you see god?
That’s a mushroom not a helmet
This one works too, I’ll take it instead. Guaranteed to cure depression on the first shot.
Not just depression! It can cure pretty much anything. Flu, cancer, hiccups…
well that’s seven ways to avoid botching it
Wear it in the bath
Ooh. Brain Degausser!
like how annealing metal reshapes the crystal structure, this straightens the wrinkles in your brain
MY HALPY HELMET ALSO MAKES ME HELMET HORNY
Why do I smell burnt toast?
I think the trick to it curing people is that they realize an electromagnetic pulse tapping on your skull rapidly for a few seconds over half an hour sucks more than being depressed.
Or maybe it just didn’t work for me.
Toaster warm. Autumn cold. Toaster – good.
