• addictedtochaos@lemm.ee
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    2 months ago

    turns out my whole family is toxic as *hit because we all have adhd or autism, i have both. dad is autistic, mom has adhd.

    i am the only one diagnosed with treatment.

    i blocked half of my family, for good reason.

      • calcopiritus@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Oh that’s what it is. I read that as “hit” and kept looking for the closing ‘*’. That is so fucking annoying.

      • chuckleslord@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        I mean, I understand what you’re saying and it is true here on lemmy, but it is absolutely not the case that you don’t have to self-censor on the internet. I mean, you can choose to not to, but some systems will just never show your contribution to the conversation to anyone (ex. tiktok, Facebook, YouTube, etc). So people practice self-censorship to engage with those platforms and then it becomes a part of their online vocabulary.

        So, you don’t need to self-censor here on lemmy, but you also shouldn’t give anyone flak for doing so.

        Umm, ffs, if I used that right.

        • Jax@sh.itjust.works
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          2 months ago

          No I think their point stands. There are plenty of words to choose from, you simply don’t need to say shit. Like it is quite literally that simple, use the word or don’t.

          • chuckleslord@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            Yeah, but the person is speaking to you using their vocabulary that they use day-to-day. Sure, they could pick whatever other words they want to, but doing so would fall outside of their usual vocabulary and, therefore, takes more effort than just “replace the part of this word I normally use that’s blocked by censor”. You can tie yourself into knots trying to avoid censored words and also this new requirement of only using a word by using that word.

            The point, as I see it, of “don’t use the word if you’re not going to use the word” is “don’t inconvenience me with your language, inconvenience yourself in order to not inconvenience me.” Sounds like a path to everyone second guessing everything they say in order to accommodate whatever desire other people wish to interject on your choice of words. Which, doesn’t sound very live más to me. Very un-taco bell of you (I have no idea what happened in that last part of my statement)

            Edit: easiest way to say it: you clearly knew what word they meant so why are you making a stink about it not matching exactly to that word?

            • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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              2 months ago

              You clearly knowing what they meant means the entire point of the censorship is lost. So at that point it’s completely unnecessary. If I can tell what you meant the censorship is just pandering to pedantic people who think swear words are uncouth.

              Just use the damn word or choose a different one. If you’re that worried about censorship you’ve solved both problems by never even letting them arise in the first place.

    • ayaya@lemdro.id
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      2 months ago

      Similar story here. Asperger’s runs on both of my parents’ sides of the family. In addition Dad has ADHD and mom has BPD. I ended up with the Autism+ADHD combo with sprinkling of CPTSD on top. I don’t even know where the neurological problems end and the psychological problems begin.

      Have not talked to either in well over a decade.

      • addictedtochaos@lemm.ee
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        2 months ago

        I read that adhd families are way often structured in very unhealthy was than you might think.

        my theory is, that my siblings and my mom don’t want to get diagnosed, because then they had to accept that they are defective; the are living the delusion that all their countless adhd problems are somebodies elses fault.

        they can never break out of that thinking.