From the looks of it he’s been creating jobs!
The person who posted this was actually trying to sound smart, or is a parody of a moron trying to sound smart?
8,000 species of termites survived the flood, implying that Noah had them on his wooden boat. Of course, Noah is an idiot.
Wait a minute.
Did Noah own slaves that he left to drown?
Also, did all the babies that God drowned go to heaven?
Also you have no idea how happy to hear that Noah, his wife, and his three sons weren’t the only ones on board the ark. The wives of his sons were apparently there as well, otherwise that could have got awkward.
Shut up and own the libs
no he pwned them
Whoa Whoa.
The story of Noah’s Ark is not about saving animals. It is about surviving a calamity that one saw coming, AND NOT saving more of humanity. This way one and their children can become insanely wealthy, and nearly the only humans.
When one needed an elephant, where did they go? To Noah. Need a chicken? Noah! Need help due to your house washing away, killing you and your family? That’s right, Noah!
Not far off from the truth. It was about preserving the royal bloodline from Abraham, to David, to Jesus Christ. Also based on archeological data, the flood was a more localized disaster than we realize.
It was more about ripping off a bit of the Epic of Gilgamesh that the author liked.
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You say he’s an idiot, but at least he’s not as dumb as the carpenters who put their pay from working on the ark into their savings.
Or worse, he gave them really generous IOUs, collectible the week after the flood was expected.
To who? Trump? Better the ark.
Biblical God being as jealous as He is about worshipping only
him,Him, burning the money as a sacrifice to Him could have changed His mind about sending the Flood. Only if everyone had joined in, of course. But I guess Noah was better at carpentry than persuasion.
Plutocrats preparing for the apocalypse while staffing every town cryer job in the neighborhood with a guy who screams “Rain has always happened! Flooding is scientifically impossible! The people installing buoys on their homes over there are the reason you haven’t seen the sun in a week.”
The whole idea of Noah is insane. No boat could hold all land mammals.
Plus most would just consume each other during the storms. Noah was probably a boat maker that said he was going to build the biggest boat ever. Then got sidelined by cost and labor.
Then someone decided to make a story in his honor in an old book of fairy tales.
There is textual and historical evidence that Noah’s ark was adapted from the epic of Gilgamesh, which predates Noah’s ark by about 1000 years. So it doesn’t make sense because it’s plagiarized from a story that was never meant to be taken seriously.
Wikipedia briefly covers this on the page about Noah, and also talks about a story about Deucalion:
The story of Noah in the Pentateuch is similar to the flood narrative in the Mesopotamian Epic of Gilgamesh, composed around 1800 BC, where a hero builds an ark to survive a divinely sent flood. Scholars suggest that the biblical account was influenced by earlier Mesopotamian traditions, with notable parallels in plot elements and structure. Comparisons are also drawn between Noah and the Greek hero Deucalion, who, like Noah, is warned of a flood, builds an ark, and sends a bird to check on the flood’s aftermath.
Nahh, reality is far more interesting. There WAS an insanely massive flood over in the middle east. Think like the Bonneville Floods or the Pacific Nothwest flood that happened thousands of years ago big where inland seas had a glaciar/land dam break. The Native Americans have stories of both, and there is ample geologic evidence of them.
I forgot exactly which region the middle east one flooded out, but it was populated at the time and there are non-religous texts recording some farmer who built basically a giant raft for all of his farm animals, and maybe some other people helped and joined. He mostly just got washed out to sea, but got back to land and … yep, religous people turned it in to gross lies to ‘elevate’ their false knowledge.
Or maybe a genetic memory of when the Mediterranean valley became the Mediterranean Sea (way before humans evolved).
lol no. There have been dozens upon dozens of massive flooding events since the Mediterranean Sea has existed. Even many massive vulcanic floods.
Also the homo genus is ~2.5 million years old. Even some estimates for homo sapiens are nearly a million years old.
To pay more taxes and/or GI vegan, vuy less useless crap, bike to work, buy local
