Meanwhile I put my hands in my sweatshirt pockets (zip-up sweatshirt, not pull-over) and flap them like wings while slow-running at them, yelling and stomping each step. Basically do what they do, but I’m bigger.

I look insane, but they fuck right off, since it’s all signals they understand.

I used to work at a place that had a sitting pond right against the building with walkways across it and stuff and that was the only way out to the back parking lot… there were always geese… I got fed up and tried that once when I was having a bad day, and it both worked and made me feel a ton better.