I know I keep posting over and over but I’m in so much pain and I have no one or nowhere to go to when I am sad. I’m trying to channel everything internally without being such a burden and annoyance to people. I keep asking myself “why didn’t he fight for me and his relationship?” “Why am I so easy to be given up on?” “Was I even special to him?” … I cannot stop crying. I feel hopeless right now. When we stopped talking for a couple days and I reached out for closure, he said not speaking for those three days makes him realize he should’ve been more appreciative of me and how hard I tried and all those things. But if he was saying those things then why not turn it around? 😔I sound like a hopeless romantic but I can’t wrap my head around anything anymore… the closure somehow made it worse I guess. I told him I forgive him for anything he thinks he did wrong. He appreciated that. I miss him so much. I miss our memories, I miss his face. Something deep down inside of me feels like I’m going to see his face again but I know that’s false reality. We never even got to talk to each other about these things in person. I just want to cry in his arms.
Instead of asking yourself why he didn’t fight for you and your relationship, tell yourself that you are worth more than that. I know it’s easier said than done but the idea is to have some self worth and to know your worth. Don’t let people walk over you, and that also means don’t give a get out of jail free card for any unknown thing he may have done. That is belittling to yourself and you’re worth more than that. He made a choice, and if he doesn’t want to fight for you then don’t fight for him.
Beyond that, find a new hobby or interest and dive into that. Bonus points if it is some kind of group where you meet new people. Find ways to be happy with yourself before the next relationship.
Best of luck. And I’ll add to the choir that time does help. It may feel like you’re drowning now but everything will be ok and work out for the best.