There’s all-inclusive resorts, yes, and I’ve found they’re generally more expensive than cruises. If you make your resort hotel float, it’s cheaper. I don’t know why.

Because you can get away with following very few regulations if you’re in international waters, and pollute the shit out of the environment. Cruises are horrible, environmentally speaking.

My wife’s family loves cruises. I have made it very clear that I am morally opposed and will not join them on one, but her mom has tried to schedule a cruise as a family vacation anyway at least twice. I think she now finally understands I’m not going to be convinced by being told how much fun they are, after I outright said, “I understand they’re awesome, I’m sure I would love it, but I am not going to support that industry and its practices.”

At one point I honestly think she thought if she just got it scheduled and everyone else was onboard I’d come along. Fortunately she never got that far.

(I promise she’s actually a pretty cool person, I love my mother-in-law very much, but she can be stubborn.)