• altphoto@lemmy.today
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    15 hours ago

    I don’t ask for much but if the cookie dough god does exist may he produce unlimited cookies inside every evil person on the planet. Let’s go easy, 1 cookie per minute for the first day. Double that every hour until they repent… I mean rip and pop.

  • Lembot_0004@discuss.online
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    19 hours ago

    What’s the point? Water to wine is really cool, shit to fish is also cool. But slightly change the cookie ingredients? That’s my grandmother’s level. She’s a nice woman but doesn’t claim some voodoo-smoodoo goddo powers.

      • Lembot_0004@discuss.online
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        18 hours ago

        Have you bought your god at Temu? Replace it with something less pathetic. Carrots to chicken tier at least.

        • alaphic@lemmy.world
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          18 hours ago

          Bro, carrots to chicken? Really? You literally had anything to anything to choose from here - while attempting to literally one-up a god, mind - sky’s the limit and everything, and that’s what you settle on?

          Not rocks into gold, sand into heroin, water into a 40 year old scotch, pee into milkshakes; nah, that’d be fuckin lame compared to carrots into motherfuckin chicken! I mean, I get it, kinda, cuz I’m not into carrots and would prefer chicken in its place 100% of the time, but… I’m just sayin, compared to some of the possibilities that’s like mid at best, prolly more like a sidegrade if we’re being honest.

          Oooh, every other flavor Starburst into pink! Boom. Talk about unlimited cosmic power

  • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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    18 hours ago

    Jesus warranted being followed even if he didn’t perform any miracles… I mean, whatever connection you think he had to God, the man was a brave anti-imperialist and revolutionary thinker (and a proto-feminist/egalitarian too), after all. Then the Romans hollowed out his ideology and the rest is history.

  • altkey@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    16 hours ago

    But would Jesus complain if there was a mistake in his order, would he swap it himself or just let it be?

  • Hylactor@sopuli.xyz
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    17 hours ago

    The real miracle was creating chocolate chip cookies 1,908 years or so before they were invented.